OH DC, What are you doing???

So, DC just gave us eight page sneak peeks of some of their post Convergence titles. I'm going to give title names and a brief explanation of why they suck, because they do suck, but I'm not putting up any pictures. No way I'm encouraging this behavior.

THE OMEGA MEN

I vaguely remember this series. There are a lot of panels. Kinda hurt my eyes after a while and reminded me of an old Giffen joke. Bah!

STARFIRE

Sick of being a superhero, she moves to Florida. Um, okay. Wasn't going to read this anyway. Do comics still need this kind of mindless eye candy? Bleh!

DETECTIVE COMICS

James Gordon as Robo Batman???? Really?????

DOOMED

A person who turns into Doomsday as a super hero and has trouble controlling the change?? You mean The Hulk?

MIDNIGHTER

Isn't this gay Batman from Image? I'm not being mean I'm just asking? Does he get a comic book just because he's, well, Gay Batman??

GREEN LANTERN

Now it's a Power Glove instead of a Power Ring? Cane he play old school Nintendo with it? And the art is terrible like a lot of these entries.

GREEN ARROW

They made him in his twenties again?   I like old and ornery Green Arrow myself.

RED HOOD AND ARSENAL

Speedy and the Robin that got crowbarred by The Joker because I forgot to call a 900 number??? And they are fighting Kobra. I remember when Kobra was cool for a hot minute. Now, not so much.

PREZ

This is one I was looking forward to. Out of context it just seems, I don't know...dumb? Yeah, let's go with dumb. Also the artwork is just horrid.

SECTION EIGHT

I know who Hitman is. I had no idea this book existed previously. The artwork and dialogue makes it read like something out of the pages of 2000 A.D. and that is great. Who knows, I might get it. I might also stand in the comic book shop and just read the damned thing. I buy enough stuff from them. They can throw me this bone for crying out loud!

Anyway, this batch of sneak peeks makes me cringe for what is coming next.

Seeya!

Fine, here's one picture ya big babies!