Thursday, July 4, 2013

CAPTAIN AMERICA



I really like the character of Captain America. He is my favorite super hero. Eight issues ago I picked up the new Captain America book.
Now, now I might have to put it down.
Warning! There are spoilers ahead!
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(You get the idea, right?)

So, here I am with my new Captain America book. Something should have thrown me off with the first issue. We get a flashback of Steve Rogers as a child. Okay. We've been here before. I'm game. Let's go. Steve Rogers is sent on a secret mission to a subway where people have come up missing. He wakes up in Dimension Z, the home of Arnim Zola. Things are not going well, but he manages to escape and he took a small baby with him. He saved it from the corruption of Zola.
Okay, this is going to be one of those epic Kirby kind of things. I can do this.
second issue brings the stainless steel balls with a black page and white lettering .



It reads; ONE YEAR LATER.
Cap is still in Dimension Z, the boy is older and they are finding out that there are creatures that live in Dimension Z. Cap has to fight their leader without his shield and takes some serious damage, but Cap refuses to quit and wins the fight.
During this there is more flashbacks of Steve's childhood that gives us more depth than we have had in a long time. Cap and Ian settle in with the tribe of creatures and things relax.
For a minute.
Then the leader confronts Cap and slashes his chest with an energy blade. There should be more blood, but Cap has an Arnim Zola face of his own.
Issue Four takes a ballsier step than before. It opens with another black page, but this time it reads, Eleven Years Later.
Really?!?!



Ian is grown into a 12 year old by this time and Cap has taught him many things to survive in Dimension Z. Ian sees the Zola face for the first time and discovers his true heritage.
Meanwhile Zola and his daughter, Jet Black have discovered the creature that Cap defeated and exiled years ago. They discover that the tribe had been harboring Cap and Jet Black thinks that Ian is dead. She leads a group of Cap Monsters to destroy her perceived enemy.
When they find Cap and Ian Jet Black proceeds to shred Cap in battle. Ian steps in and saves him and Jet Black realizes her brother is alive.Zola arrives at the scene in battle armor, pummels Cap and takes Ian back.. Cap realizes what he must do and cuts the Zola from his chest.
He will save Ian from Zola.
At Zola's compound, Jet Black is torn. She had always believed that Cap murdered her brother and, given the chance, could have killed her in battle. He did neither. Ian's brainwashing begins in earnest and we discover that Zola's true goal is to create a race of supermen in the image of Cap. Something always makes the clones self destruct, but he is getting closer to discovering why.



Meanwhile, Cap gets the drop on Jet Black and incapacitates her.
Cap continues through the Zola compound, but Jet Black has freed herself and when she has the drop on him, she saves him instead. She agrees to save the tribe that Zola has captured and is using for genetic material while Cap continues to look for Ian. When she leaves, Cap is hot by Ian in the back.
Now, with all this leading up to the newest issue I have to again, tell you there are spoilers. Extensive spoilers for Issue 8.
Ready?



So, Cap is down with a bullet that passed through his midsection. He is still bleeding from the huge carved wound that he inflicted when he cut out the Zola Face. The issue starts with him blacked out because one of the Cap Monsters has punched him repeatedly in the face. Cap manages to take out the Cap Monster, but then Ian bashes him in the head with some form of wreckage. He hits him repeatedly in the spine where Jet Black had almost incapacitated him earlier.
As this is going on Zola's plan is fully revealed as he is readying his army of monsters to attack Earth. Jet Black is hurrying to free the tribe and is confronted by Zola, who she attacks.
Ian is hammering away at Cap with a makeshift shield and manages to embed it in Cap's back. Ian has Cap where he wants him. On the ground, beaten and bloody. Ian puts a gun to his face, but in the end he can't do it. He remembers his childhood and can't do it.
Yeah.
Then Sharon Carter shows up and shoots him through the neck and he falls into the vat of goo that Zola uses to make his monsters.
um...
WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!

(Cover your ears here, kiddies. It's gonna be loud.)

What the fuck kind of fucked up storyline is this? It's bad enough that we are supposed to believe that even Captain America's body can take the kind of sustained, brutal punishment throughout the course of these eight issues, but then this is how we wrap shit up in Dimension Z? Really?!?
And here's the worst part;
With all that any true Captain America fan has invested over the past 8 issues, the only two outcomes of this are going to suck.
One, Ian was manufactured by Zola so the plunge into the vats will revive him and he and Cap will have a tearful reunion.



BLECH! I call BULLSHIT!
Two, Ian stays dead.
These are terrible choices and I would be more compelled to say I prefer the latter. And if they ever bring Ian back it will cheapen this death as much as when Frank Miller killed Elektra.
And writer Rick Remender knows how badly this is fucked up. Why? Well, one of the true things I like about this book is that they have a letters page. The first line, written by Remender is;

"So, look, you're probably upset with me right now."

YA THINK!

I can not express how much I have liked this new run of Captain America. This, along with his run in Uncanny Avengers is so very awesome. But, in the end, this issue read like some sort of twisted torture porn with a smack your self in the head ending. And they really want you to know that Ian got killed because the neck shot art is one entire page!!!!

I don't know. I think when issue 9 comes out I might have calmed down, but I might just read it at the comic book store and decide whether it comes home with me.

I just don't know.