Wednesday, January 21, 2009


Ever since I saw the advert for this flick quite a number of months ago in Rue Morgue and Fango mags, not only was I  completely smitten with the few images I'd seen, but I was also so very ready to see another masterpiece out of Japan comparable to the amazing Machine Girl (also directed by Yoshihiro Nishimura, see past entries right here for a write up). For the several weeks following I did nothing but check on release dates, torrents and the like to one day hope and pray that I would stumble across what was sure to be an epic gore fest for the ages. Then, this past Tuesday, it was released and therefore download-able. Oh sure, my buddy Doug informed me that every site he'd found had 10 times as many leechers as seeders (if you don't know what I mean, well, look it up...) and it could take potentially hours or days to fully 'appear'. Well, I found one and gave it a shot. That night, Monday, I was watching the movie I'd salivated over for far too long. 

And so it began: running red with overtly hysterical hose-like sprays of blood from every conceivable location. I really wasn't interested in a plot or a story, all I wanted to see was ridiculous gore from every corner of the cinematic globe. I was not disappointed, well, inasmuch as there was certainly gallons upon gallons of pumped blood. However, I have to say (sad-heartedly, in fact) that after an hour -half the film- the severings and limb-removals tend to get just a little, well, stale. Oh, don't get me wrong: there are plenty of original slayings to more than make up for them and, I have to lovingly admit, quite similar in 'vein' (HA!) to The Story of Ricki. Speaking of story and the aforementioned plot, there actually was one, though thoroughly interspersed with bits of character history and the like, which was okay, too, if it hadn't been for the random splicings of completely unnecessary and jarring Japanese 'killer' commercials. Well, you'll just have to watch to see what I mean. Anyway, there is this new police force in Japan who do nothing but take down these bad guys known as Engineers who can, at will once their human structure in compromised, re-grow a limb sporting a bio-weapon exactly like the one they'd been using such as a chainsaw or Samurai Sword. Now, our main protagonist is one Ruka (Eihi Shiina), who just so happens to be the very best at her specific job of slaying Engineers and even receives a special medal for killing her 50th. Good for her! Anyway, she discovers that the real reason why the Engineers can do that voodoo that they do is due to a little key-shaped 'tumor' that 'unlocks' the specific part of the body that can and will transform into the new weapon. Now here's where it gets a little convoluted. I'm still a little unsure where the Keyman (Itsuji Itao) got his power from, but it looked like a church and some tiny man handed him a jar of urine. Yeah, that was a bit odd. Anyway, creatures with gator-mouth crotches, protruding eyeballs, peeing gigantic vaginas, and toothy boobs abound in this freak festival and I'm damn glad of it. There is action, loads of guns, a woman drawn and quartered by four cop cars, and, as I said, enough sprinkler-ed blood to water the White House lawn. I suggest you find a way to get ahold of this and laugh along at its over-the-top-ness and stack this up as one of the best Japanese Gore flicks of all time. Nice!


** Enjoy this fantastic trailer! **

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