The SpiderWoman/Milo Manara Debacle

See the picture? That is done by a famous ARTIST named Milo Manara. Milo Manara primarily does EROTIC ART. Why Marvel Comics had him do a cover of Spider Woman is beyond me, but she has always been a sex symbol at Marvel.
Now some people, and I use the term loosely, have decided to get their politically correct panties in a bunch over this. A problem Spider Woman would never have because, as you can see in the picture above, there is no way in Hell she is wearing any panties in that get up.
I made the mistake of reading the comments that came with this article about the panty bunching and realized that these people have two problems;
One, they are trying to dictate art. Andy Warhol stated that art is whatever you can get away with. Marvel asked Milo Manara to do this cover. They paid him. He got away with it. If you don't like it, don;t buy it. Kind of like how television and radio have on and off switches only this time it's just focusing your eyes elsewhere. And if you are unable to do that, you might have bigger problems than a picture of Spider Woman by a famed EROTIC ARTIST.
The other problem I saw is that most of these complaints come from people that don't read comic books. They complained that the costume was unrealistic, that there were no visible seams, that her vagina was splayed for the world to see.
You complain about that, but don't bring up the impossibility of a woman having super powers.
Um, that's just dumb.
Milo Manara is a revered, award winning artists. He is very good at drawing what he draws and he was asked to do this. Leave him alone and just direct your ill advised, politically incompetent bile at the man in the mouse ears running the show.
Sheesh!
And my opinion on the piece of ART?
Nice ass Spider Woman.
Nice. Ass.

Avengers...Now???

So, this picture surfaced the other day concerning Marvel screwing up some of my favorite characters. Okay, really just Captain America, but still…ruined. Anyway, I wanted to put my two cents in and get this off my chest. I’m starting in the left hand upper row and working my way across and then down to the second row. I’ll put names to faces to make it less confusing.

MEDUSA – So, she doesn’t cover her face anymore, but we made sure to get some jewelry on her lady parts in the nether regions? Maybe it’s to make sure that Black Bolt doesn’t shred her when they are getting busy? One little moan from the leader of the Inhumans and her vageen is liquefied.

SCARLET WITCH – Classic look. She seems thinner. Did she lose weight for some reason?

IRON MAN – Where is the red and gold? Did Tony Stark use all of his paint allowance on fancy sports cars again? Now he looked like an armored Silver Surfer.

DOCTOR STRANGE –The form fitting costume looks a little sixties. He’s the Sorcerer Supreme not an opening act for Burt Wonderstone. Give me a break. Also, he appears thinner as well. Does magic make you skinny? Like Atkins?

ANT-MAN  - That helmet is stupid. Also, which of the seventy five incarnations of Ant-Man is this one? Hank Pym? Scott Lang? Paul Rudd?
WINTER SOLDIER – Winter Soldier is cool.

ANGELA  - What is this Red Sonja rip off from Spawn doing here? At least she’s not Thor’s sister or something dumb. What’s that? Oh nooooo…

THOR – Apparently Thor found out he had a sister and got mad jealous about the boobs. So, now he’s got boobs. Also, and this is just a guess…lady parts.

CAPTAIN AMERICA – Steve Rogers is Captain America. They have pulled this stunt before. They will do it again. Sam Wilson’s days are numbered and he don’t even know it. At least they let him keep the wings. It will be funny the first time he has to throw the shield and then spends an hour looking for it.

INFERNO – I wondered why The Human Torch was running around in some rags, but I guess this is someone else. I have no idea who this is. But, we already have a guy that can burst into flame. A few of them actually, so this guy should just go see if DC Comics can use him.

DEATHLOK – I always liked the design of Deathlok. This is just a copy from the show Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. It works on TV. Not in comics. In comics it looks dumb.

There you go, my two cents. Take it, leave it, I do not care. I am appreciative of Marvel making so many stupid changes. I am saving a bundle on comic books I no longer have to buy.

Another Captain America Rant

This Captain America is better than what Marvel has planned.

There are those of us that are what I like to call, long term fans. We read comic books before there were comic book stores. We went to the local grocer and went through the spinner rack anytime we had more than a quarter to spend. I was lucky in that both of my parents are big readers so they figured reading anything is a good thing.

There are comic book characters I have more affinity for than others. The Fantastic Four, The Avengers, Spider Man and especially, Captain America. OF all of them, he is my favorite. A man who wanted nothing more than to be a good soldier and fight against the bullies of the world. And Captain America, while being a symbol is Steve Rogers. It is the mindset of that single individual that makes Captain America the symbol that he is. People argue that the suit is the symbol regardless of who wears it and, while that is true, if it hadn’t been for Steve Rogers, there would be no symbol.

Last time I wrote that writer Rick Remender should be removed from the current incarnation of Captain America comics. In my opinion, he has ruined the entire character of Captain America in a very short period of time. He has removed the super soldier formula that makes Captain America the hero that he is. Steve Rogers has been reduced to a very old man.

This has been done before. Cap has been depowered. Cap has become disillusioned with America. Cap gets murdered. All been done before and then they replace him with someone else. John Walker, Bucky Barnes, The Falcon.

Waitaminit!

Did you say, The Falcon.

Yes, apparently there will be a new comic, also by Remender, where The Falcon takes up the mantle of Captain America and old man Steve Rogers helps him on his adventures.

This is, without a doubt, the worst idea for Captain America I have ever had. The Falcon is a hero in his own right. I have always been a fan of Sam Wilson, unless Remender is writing him. Then it’s just wrong. Sam getting drunk and getting his freak on with Jet Black. Yeah, not my Falcon.

Why would he agree to do this? I know he would do it if Steve asked, but it just seems wrong. Apparently, there will be a new book for this so Marvel can slap another oversized #1 on the cover of a book.

Luckily,  IDW still makes Godzilla comics. Fortunately, DC has the incredible J.M. DeMatteis continues to thrill me with Justice League Dark and, in the land of Marvel, there are things like Amazing X-Men, Spider-Man 2099 and a few others that I still read. Once a Marvel Zombie always a Marvel Zombie.

Still, it saddens me when I go to the comic shop and there isn’t an Avengers comic or a Captain America comic in my things I grab for the week. See, I’m old fashioned and don’t do pull lists. I like thumbing through the comics and grabbing what I see that catches my eye.

Keeps me young. Like Steve Rogers before Rick Remender fucked it all up.

On a side note, I mentioned writing this article and my wife exploded. She was furious about the whole thing. To be fair they did turn Thor into a woman the day before and she hated that. I thought it was sweet that she had the same opinion about Captain America as I did.

I knew marrying her was going to be awesome!

FIRE RICK REMENDER!

This was the war cry recently due to what people thought was statutory rape by a drunken Sam Wilson a.k.a. The Falcon in a recent issue of Captain America. This, of course, turned out to be a misconception and not true so, that reason for firing Rick Remender is unsubstantiated.

Let me give you the real reasons for firing Rick Remender. There are more than a few.

I had recently gotten back into buying monthly comics again. It had been many years and I decided since my daughters both liked comic books we would make a biweekly trek to the local comic book store. The girls and I would ransack the quarter bin and then pick out some monthly titles. One liked My Little Pony and the other was a huge Daredevil fan. I saw that a new Captain America title was starting up and then, because of The Avengers film there were about fifty eight Avengers titles. I went with Uncanny Avengers because Captain America was in it. It looked like fun.

These are both written by Rick Remender.

At first I liked both titles.  Captain America in Dimension Z reminded me of the old Jack Kirby days. It was cool. The Uncanny Avengers with its meld of Avengers and X-Men was cool.

Then a few issues went by.

Captain America was still in Dimension Z. Didn’t he have a new movie coming out soon? Wasn’t it getting tiresome? Yeah, it was. And then when he did leave Remender killed Sharon Carter (Again???) and the kid that Cap had raised for years. And, since it was a pocket dimension no time had passed in the Marvel Universe. Another aspect was just the amount of torture Captain America was put through in each issue. Beaten, stabbed, brutalized issue after issue. It became numbing and I just dropped the title. I wanted nothing to do with Cap’s return to the real world, or at the very least, Marvel Universe. This was not my Captain America.

Uncanny Avengers wasn’t faring much better. It seems that Mr. Remender is only capable of long form, event stories. Sometimes those are fun. All the time, they are not.  And, after I dropped the title he apparently slaughtered a bunch of super heroes. It’s Marvel, they make a lot of money off of their heroes. We know that none of these deaths are permanent. If Frank Miller couldn’t keep Elektra dead, Rick Remender sure isn’t going to keep any of the Avengers six feet under.

I traded up for the infinitely better Avengers A.I. Of course, they cancelled that titles and I did buy The Uncanny Avengers Annual, but that was terrible. I got excited when I saw Man-Thing on the cover. Yeah, why did I think Remender would know how to write Man-Thing? Beats me.

 And the new twist in Captain America is that they sucked the super soldier formula out of him and he’s an old man. Yeah, this has been done. Steve Rogers still needs to be Captain America for two more Avengers movies and one more solo film. Do you think the money men at Disney are going to let this stick? If you don’t know how to realistically tell stories within the context of someone else’s sandbox, maybe you should go find something else to do. I hear Remender has an independent book of his own. Maybe he could do that instead of ruining characters that I have decades of history with. Writers and artists have managed to tell stories about Captain America that are funny, smart, exciting and done in one that don’t feel the necessity to shake things up.

So, fire Rick Remender? Absolutely, but not for some stupid, trumped up internet frenzy. Do it because he is terrible at his job.

FREE COMIC BOOK DAY!!

So, another Free Comic Book Day has come and gone. My youngest daughter, Dandelion and I got up early, walked to the bus stop and managed to get to the front of the store by 7:30. Figuring we would be first we rounded the corner to Fanfare…

And there was the tent. A tent! We had never encountered a tent in the years of going to Free Comic Book Day. It wasn’t so bad. We got some coffee and breakfast sandwiches from the local gas station. My buddy Stew Miller showed up and later we spotted by son, Seann with my daughter in law, Tabbie and my grandson Willie. Neil Bryer also showed up and we all just hung out while the staff trickled into the building.

Then it was time to go in and get our comics. I had some I knew I needed and others I just was going to peruse. Here are the comics I got and what I think of them.

Future’s End #0 (DC Comics)

Written by Brian Azzarello, Jeff Lemire, Keith Giffen, & Dan Jurgens

Art by Aaron Lopresti, Patrick Zircher, Jesus Merino & Dan Jugens

DC’s new event comic is a weekly comic that will run for a little less than a year. It starts 35 years in the future when Brother Eye is destroying mankind and only Batman Beyond, yeah from the cartoon, can travel back in time to save us all.

One problem;

He shows up five years too late and still has to get the job done.

The major players in this comic are Frankenstein, Batman Beyond and OMAC. I like two out of three of those so I was excited to get this zero issue that starts the whole thing off.

Then I read it.

Yeah, I didn’t like when Marvel did Age of Ultron and that’s all this really is only stretched out into a weekly series. I’m not paying over a hundred and fifty bucks for a story that was tired before it began.  At least Age of Ultron only ran for a few issues before it was over and didn’t matter. When will comic companies realize that the whole go back in time to stop the future storyline has been done…repeatedly?  At least I got the first issue for free so there was no wasted money.

Shigeru Mizuki’s Showa A History of Japan

Told in Manga style this is the author’s autobiographical tale of being in the Japanese army. It’s interesting in that the author draws himself very cartoony, but there is some seriously photo realistic artwork in here as well. I would read this entire series. Maybe since I’m saving so much money on DC Future’s End I can get this instead.

Red Giant’s Duel Identity/Pandora’s Blog

This is one of those flip books that is so popular during Free Comic Book Day. Duel Identity deals with a super heroine with nano technology who also works undercover assassinating who she’s told to. Kinda weird behavior for a supposed super heroine. Pandora’s Blog is, well I have no idea what this is supposed to be about. Some sick kid who turns into a stone gargoyle at the end. IS this a horror comic or what? It seems rushed and confused.

I personally, have never heard of Red Giant comics, but if this is what they have to offer I doubt I will be making a return trip. Also, the books are smaller than normal and that seems weird to me.

Archaia Presents Mouse Guard

This little hardcover book is the reason I make sure that I am first, or because of the damned tent, second every year for Free Comic Book Day. That’s right, it is a hardcover comic book and it has little stories from all of the titles that Archaia prints.

They are;

Mouse Guard by David Petersen

Rust by Royden Lepp

Labyrinth Written by Adam Smith and Illustrated by Kyla Vanderklugt

Bolivar by Sean Rubin

Will O The Wisp Written by Tom Hammock Illustrated by Megan Hutchinson

Farscape by Ramon K Perez

Of the batch the Mouse Guard story, Tale of the Axe Trio is the best with a close second of a tale of Ludo in the Labyrinth story. Rust, which I have read seems like it brings nothing to the table regardless of how pretty it is. The entire book is gorgeous and deserves a place on any book shelf. I hope they make these every year.

They also gave us cool Space Marine figures from Warhammer 40K which I have assembled and they have taken up space on my desk at work. Very cool.

There were also some temporary tattoos that I will keep and a sticker that now lives on the backside of my laptop.

Now, not being a leech I also use that day to pick up some of the new comics I always get. I have discovered that if my oldest daughter, Delia and my lovely wife, Martha are going to be fans of Moon Knight and Silver Surfer that I will have to start having a pull list for them. Luckily, my comics are always on the rack so let’s review those shall we?

All New Invaders #3 & 4

Written by James Robinson

Illustrated by Steve Pugh

This is classic Invaders in the here and now. Captain America, The original Human Torch and Sub Mariner. They throw in Winter Soldier because he used to be Bucky and they have a severe Kree problem. See there’s this device called The God’s Whisper that allows a person to control Gods. The Invaders took it away from the Nazis back in World War 2 and now the Kree have it. The Supreme Intelligence has plans for dominating the universe and will stop at nothing. To get to Hala, the Kree homeworld, they employ the teleportation powers of Aarkus, the original Vision to get them there.

This is wonderful storytelling at its finest. I have been led to understand that Mr. Robinson does a great job with comics, Starman is the one that most people bring up. I honestly haven’t read those and have no desire to, but if it’s good enough for everyone else then I’m glad he’s taking the time to craft a well done tale with one of my favorite super hero teams. I’m glad to see one of my favorite teams getting the respect they deserve in the modern age of Marvel. Also, the covers by artist Mukesh Singh are all poster worthy. It makes me happy that one team book is going the way that I want it to.

Uncanny Avengers Annual #1

I know, I know. I said I quit buying this book and that is a true statement. Annuals rarely, if ever, have anything to do with a running storyline and this annual is no exception. Besides, The Arthur Adams cover alone is worth the five bucks and it’s got Man-Thing in it.

Man-Thing.

Unfortunately, it seems that the book deals with Mojo, who usually bothers the X-Men. Being that the Uncanny team has a lot of mutants in its roster that makes perfect sense, but I don’t like Mojo. Never have. He is pitching a new show to the people in charge called The Supernatural Avengers with Marvel’s line up of supernatural characters.

Sounds cool.

Then it spins off into some high school TV drama and it gets stupid.

Ah well, at least I have that really cool cover. I can bag the comic and hang it on the wall. That would be cool.

I am so glad I stopped buying this book.

Avengers A.I. #12

This is my sad review of the column. I was so excited to see this book on the shelf as it is my favorite Avengers comic being created right now.

The cover said Finale.

I hope that it was the finale to the current storyline and it was, but it was more than that.

It is the last issue of this series and that makes me sad.

No more Doombot? I love Doombot, how can they take him away from me like that? I do hope that the members of the team become incorporated elsewhere. I would buy that book.

The story? Yeah, they win. The Avengers always win no matter what and it wraps it up pretty cool and weird, just like the book has always done.

This sucks.

That’s it for Free Comic Book Day. The good, the bad, the suck. All wrapped up in a pretty bow.

In two weeks I will be attending Motor City Comic Con so I will file a report shortly after that. With pictures.

Seeya! 

Marvel Super Hero Smashers

Anyone who knows me knows that I am a huge Captain America fan. Luckily, I am able to put toys on my desk at work so there are an unnatural amount of Captain America toys populating my desk. There is also a small army of BeMos from Adventure Time, but that’s another story.

When I heard that Marvel was doing a series of action figures where you can swap out body parts I was intrigued. When I saw the Captain America figure for nine bucks at a grocery trip to Aldi’s I took the plunge.

This is a pretty stocky action figure. I think it may have been designed with the younger crowd in mind. The musculature is stocky and exaggerated, you know, like if Bart Sears had drawn the plan for the figure. It has eleven points of articulation, which isn’t a lot, but then most figures don’t allow you to pop off various limbs and add extremities from the likes of The Hulk, Dr. Doom and Spider-Man. That is pretty cool. And, yes, you can pop the head off.

To be honest, I might pick up The Falcon figure because it goes with Captain America, but I can’t see myself investing in the entire line of figures. It would mess up my desk theme for one. Maybe if they introduce more villains. I could use a Red Skull Masher. You hear me Marvel?

My only complaint would be the injection points for the arms and legs seem a little rough and sloppy.  You can see there wasn’t much care in making these, but what can you expect from a combination of Hasbro, Marvel and China?

Other than that, he makes a worthy addition to my desk collection. He’s a pretty sturdy action figure regardless of the injection points flaw.

COMICS I READ, THE EASTER SUNDAY EDITION!

I actually picked these up on Friday, but the weekend is busy and this is the first time I got to these. It has been a couple of weeks, but when things like Cinema Wasteland rear their head then you miss the comic book shop for a  pay period. What can I say?
Ready?
Good.

GODZILLA RULERS OF THE EARTH #10



This whole issue deals with the humans trying to relocate all the kaiju to an island paradise and Godzilla fighting those twin terrors from War of the Gargantuas, Gaira and Sanda. It'sa good, solid issue, but never being a huge Gargantuas fan I really could care less. But, if it were up to me, Gigan would be in every issue, so there ya go. I hope that the release next month of the new Godzilla film creates enough in terest to keep this book around. Rumor has it that we are done at issue 12 and that would suck. One complaint, no letters page? One of my favorite things about the book is the sense of community that the letters page brings to it. Oh well, maybe next issue.

NIGHTCRAWLER #1





Nightcrawler has always been one of my favorite X-Men. I did not stick around much past the late 80's early 90's with X books though so I really had no idea that he was dead. I have been reading Amazing X-Men so I am filled in on that there. (See below for reviews of the two recent issues)
So, Nightcrawler is back along with the little blue thingies that everyone refers to as Bamfs. Wolverine still has no healing factor and Nightcrawler is helping to test his new body armor. That goes well until Wolverine has a hissy fit and pops his claws, making himself bleed.
Then Nightcrawler goes to visit his sorceress girlfriend, Amanda and some weird dude in high tech armor tries to capture him. Yeah, he fails.
As number one issues go, it sets up things and that's about it. The artwork is great, the writing is pure Claremont. It's a good thing. It is also too soon to judge where this book is going, so we will just leave it at that.

AVENGERS A.I. #11



Hard to believe that it's been almost a year on this book. This was my replacement book when Uncanny Avengers started to suck.
I'm glad I've been here for this story, it is magnificent.
See, there is this villain A.I. who is trying to destroy all humanity. He dresses up like Iron Man, but he's a huge tool. Alexis, the A.I. who remembers none of her past is catapulted 10,000 years into the future where she learns that Dimitrios has succeeded and humanity is extinct. If that wasn't enough, Dimitrios is going to use Galactus and something called The Golden Knot to go past our universe and have words with our creator.
This will destroy existence in the process, but, well did I mention that Dimitrios was insane?
Well, now you know.
So, Alexis has to go back and convince her team that they have to save an outdated LMD (Life Model Decoy) named Jessie Clatterbuck because she holds the key to our extinction.
She is currently in the hands of S.H.E.I.L.D. and they have no idea what they are playing with.
This is my favorite Marvel book out right now.
The writing by Sam Humphries is always smart and the art by Andre Lima Araujo is just so gorgeous. It feels like a Heavy Metal story, but in the Marvel Universe. I have every issue and I will still probably buy the collected edition of this because it is so good and I convince other people to read it if I have it all under one book. If you are looking for an Avengers book that is unlike anything that Marvel has ever puit out then this is the one you need to get.
You will not be sorry.
Also, there is a one panel cameo by Devil Dinosaur and we all know how much I loves me some Devil Dinosaur.

AMAZING X-MEN #5 & 6





I'm going to deal with these two books at the same time because they deal with the end of the first arc of the series and the beginning of the second arc. Also, I bought them at the same time so it seemed fitting. (You'll see me doing the same thing with Superior Foes of Spider-Man after this so it will be like a theme. Or a thingie, not sure which.)

In issue 5 Kurt comes head to head with his father Azazel to show him who's boss. He triggers a deal with the Bamfs so that they can keep Azazel bound to Earth where he can do the least amount of harm. This is a good ending to the first arc that brings us back the fuzzy elf we all know and love. Sure, he seems a little broody at times, but apparently he paid a high price to come back. Yes, I know what that is and no, I'm not telling. Read the book already. It is one of the better ones coming out of Marvel right now and I think I'm saying that because I'm old and it reminds me of the X-Men books from the 80's.

Issue 6 deals with the welcome home party with every mutant on the planet showing up to see Kurt. Unfortunately, that means that his mother, Mystique is also there. It seems she has a bone to pick with Azazel and will stop at nothing to get at him. Kurt fails in capturing either of them and it seems that his parents have something brewing that can only spell trouble for Kurt.
This issue underlines the love that Nightcrawler and Wolverine have for one another in a purely platonic way and it makes me warm and fuzzy to see them reunited after so many years. I know how I complain anbout the temporary state of death in the Marvel Universe, but it's Nightcrawler for crying out loud!! Nightcrawler!! He's one of my favorites and I'm glad that he's back.  

SUPERIOR FOES OF SPIDER-MAN #10 & 11






I'm going to go ahead and deal with both of these issues at the same time. They both feel like fill in issues to me. Issue 10 has some separate tales of Overdrive, Speed Demon and The Beetle drawn by guest artists and just feels like they are spinning their wheels. Where is Boomerang? How can you focus so much on this character and then forsake him for two issues? The worst page would be the next issue splash page that has the gang wearing or using other villains gear and then issue 11 comes out.
It deals with The Looter and The Grizzly getting their clocks cleaned by the Doc Ock version of Spider-Man. What does this have to do with anything we have been doing for the last ten issues. Hell, at least issue 10 had some of the main characters in it. This can't manage that even though it's the good art team for the book. I am going to go ahead and try one more issue, but this might be the end of my run on this book. Too bad, it was good while it lasted. Except for these last two issues.

There you go, the Easter edition of this ratty little column. In the end just remember Godzilla, Rulers of the Earth and Avengers A.I. are the go to books. The rest seems hit or miss.